14 Mar Honesty With Integrity -"I love them but…"
When I was at a 1:1 retreat with my mentor I sat in her beautiful space fully surrounded by angels and helpers.
I just heard honest… honesty… honesty over and over again and felt
I just heard honest… honesty… honesty over and over again and felt truth. I started to think if I was being honest with myself, others and then thought about qualifiers I hear a lot. The one that really interested me was “My truth is …” normally followed by something harmful.
How many times have we heard or started our own sentences with qualifiers “I shouldn’t say this about him/her BUT….” or “My Truth is that SHE…” I realized that a qualifier I fall into is “I love them but______” It goes with out saying that I love people I work and interact with on a daily basis because it is so easy to see the goodness in all people.
What is wrong with being upset with a situation and just saying “I am upset about this situation” and not qualify? I was afraid of judgement of what people would think of me saying something about a situation or if I said I was wrong, that being used against me. Stressful work environments can bring out the interesting behavior in us!
Then I realized that if said with love, respect and integrity the intent will be clear. No charge to it! We can all feel when a comment is meant to zap us and when we send that energy out. Those comments or e-mails can really hurt.
When you find yourself qualifying a statement, look at your intent. Is you intent to hurt the other person? To show you are right? To save face? Honestly face your intent and see where that comes from. Who has hurt you in these situations? There is no need to hurt anyone else. Don’t beat yourself up just move through it.